Listen to this song, and view the words below it.
I’m calling out your name won’t you come near to me
I’ve been missing those times we’ve had give me that passion again
And a heart of clay that you can mold into into a heart that’s pure
Broken for you
Vs: 2

Come and kiss me once again for your love is better than wine
In the secret place I’ve cried out for you
I am weak but you are strong so let me see your face oh God
Cause with one glance of your eyes my heart is broken
Broken for you

Chorus:

Oh I sleep but my heart is awake its the voice of the one that I love
He’s crying will you open me my love my perfect one

I’m convinced that I’ve been in a season of breaking for the past year and a half. I haven’t worked a full time job in that entire time. I’ve been tested, retested, and tested again. My faith has been stretched to the point where at times I feel like I have none left. I’ve seen God move in miraculous ways. I’ve felt like God wasn’t there at all. I’ve learned not to rely on my emotions to tell me if God is present or not. I’ve learned how to press through my lack of desire at times in order to honor God in my worship, because He is worthy whether I feel like it or not.

Being broken is not fun. It doesn’t feel good. Sure, there are moments when the clouds part and the sun shines, but for the most part, God prunes, prunes, and prunes some more. I can feel Him killing off the dead parts, rearranging the things that I thought that I wanted. I can feel my reliance on Him becoming stronger, and thus, my faith and hope in Him is growing as well. There are days when I still rage against His will, because I see with my own eyes how things that we need, things that I need are not being tended too, or at least I feel like that anyway. But I am constantly reminded that God cares about me, that He delights in everything about me. I’m reminded that He loves me whether I doubt His ways or not.
I could tell you all story after story of this process, how it began, and how I’m different than I was, but the truth is, I would rather focus on the blessing of the breaking. I was on a path before that was going to lead to me being completely outside of God’s will, at least i think. I was focused on dollar signs, reliant on my own skill and ability. I thought that if I complained to God enough, that He would bend His will to meet my dreams and goals, but in breaking me, He showed me His passion for my life, and the dreams that He has for me. And while I’m having to wait for it in the middle of all hell breaking loose within me, there are times where I have such peace about things. So, there is a blessing in being broken. The end result is a life that has been refined by the fire of God. A life that is totally molded into one that He can use without dispute. It’s the kind of life that I desired to have all of my life, but was prevented by my own pride and selfishness. I’m not perfect. These last few weeks have been tough for me as some things have happened that are threatening my future, or at least I coudl lead myself to believe that. I’m convinced though, against my feelings and what I see in front of me, that God is working all of this out. Being broken means being willing to accept whatever God sends my way with a glad heart. I’m learning.
I know some of you out there are going through the same thing. I want to encourage you that there is an end result to all of this. Trust God through the pain, the hurt, and the tears. Trust Him through the weeks and months that feel like constant midnight. Trust Him through the disappointments and failures. There is a plan. it hurts, but it is necessary in order for His will to be accomplished in your life. And we all know that this is the most important thing in the life of a Christian.

Lord, Your will be done.

Until next time, be blessed! And I’ll be praying for you.

Lord, your will be done.

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